Are You Reading This?

The first picture that someone sends me of Sex* in a voting booth will receive a $50 American Express gift certificate. The first person that sends me a good close-up picture of a notable NFL football player with Sex* will receive a $100 American Express gift certificate.

Ready...set...go!

* Our product!

SEX FOR CHRISTMAS!

Hell yea, getting some for Christmas is as traditional as snow, turkey & dressing, and jingle bells! It's better to give than receive and I don't know a single person that doesn't like Sex for Christmas. I wager to say if you did a survey of the Top Ten adult requests from Santa, sex (not our product)would be there.

I know some of you have tried to be creative over the years by wrapping yourself or suggestive little items and slipping them under the Christmas tree for giggles. Well this year you can put our little Sex under the tree and save paper. Can't you just see the smiles and exhilaration from the recipients of your thoughtful gift. Everyone deserves a little Sex for Christmas, and now you can give it freely to all.

You don't have to wait until Christmas to give Sex. Halloween is a great little treat for the holiday. Just don't hand it out to little kids ringing your door bell or your you might find your ass in jail over the holiday season getting a different kind of sex from your cell mate.

Happy Holidays!

Sex in Hand

I walked into a local watering hole last weekend and bellied up to the bar. The bartender, who looked more like a model for disposable baby diapers than someone old enough to serve adult beverages, asked me the age old question, " what'll ya have?' I gave my order and when he returned with my drink he ask, "will there be anything else?"

"Why yes," I said, " can I have Sex on your bar?" My question took the air right out of his lungs and his eyes were as big as soft balls. Unable to speak for a few seconds, I pull Sex from my front pocket and set it of the bar, readable in his direction. A degree of composure return to his face combined with the typical twisted smile I've recognized in others.

Before the evening was over, the entire bar was enjoying Sex and I am sure the topic of conversation was suggestive enough to make a few men and women luck that night. Sex is a funny little thing. You should get ya some!

New Semester..had Sex yet?

Summer is over and young adults all over the world are heading back to school. Stories will be told about the wild times had during summer, punctuated by the inevitable question that is always asked, "have you gotten any this semester?" What will your answer be? Let me tell what your answer could be:

Oh yes I had Sex the first night on campus. It was great, long lasting, hard, and made by bedroom light up. No one needs to know you really spent the night alone. They just need to know you have Sex all the time, where ever you want, and when ever you want.

Send me a picture of your school mascot holding Sex and We'll send you fee Sex.

Schools back...enjoy your Sex!

Welcome Facebook Friends!

To my sick and fast growing list of Facebook friends...welcome. You've found the site where you can by Sex, and as you well know from the Facebook entries, Sex is cool! Sex can also take you places you've never been before, assuming you win the photo contest. Like we said on Facebook: 1) Buy Sex, 2) Take a picture clearly depicting our Sex is a strange and unique setting, and 3) Send the photo to info@wodllc.com and put Photo Contest in the subject line.

When was the last time you bought Sex, took a picture of it and got a free vacation? If your Elliot Spitzer you don't need to answer.

Enjoy your Sex!!!

Six Pack to Iraq

120,000 troops in the hot ass sand in Iraq and Afghanistan with tour of duty lasting 14 months and you KNOW those guys can use some sex. Get off your patriotic ass and send'em some! If you have a friend over there fighting for freedom, I'm going to make you a deal. If you order Sex in multiples of three (3,6,9,...) we will assume your sending these to our troops and we will double your order! Twice the Sex for the regular price!

Ya know this gift will make them smile, and be honest, doesn't it make you smile knowing your sending Sex to that God forsaken sand box? So buy a six pack of Sex for your favorite Servicemen/women and let them know your thinking about'em.

REWARD: I will send you $100 for the first picture I receive from service personnel in Iraq and Afghanistan clearly showing Sex. Must be in uniform with weapon. If we get enough pictures we'll have a "Sand Box Sex Contest" with the best picture winning a prize worth coming home to.

Enjoy your Sex!

The Last Time...

When was the last time you had sex? We're not talking about our product now, which we usually note with a capital "S". We're talking the physical act, the horizontal bop, the wango tango, the wild thing, what ever you want to call it. And I don't mean with yourself. Masturbation is an act of depravity.

Maybe you've got a friend that says, "...I need sex soon or I'll..." Unless your twisted or a friend providing benefits, actually giving your friend sex may be out of the question. But giving them Sex (our product) is not. If you can't fix your friend's problem, at least have a little fun with it. That is what Sex is all about.

Not getting any? Buy Sex! Long lasting, STD free, and you can have it anywhere, anytime, and anyplace.

Enjoy your Sex!

I sold Sex to Police...

...and firemen, and other fist responders that showed up at the PeaceKeepers MC Show this weekend. Great bunch of people and certainly a worthy cause. Many more people enjoyed our Sex than purchased it, which confirms that the need to buy beer is far greater than the need for Sex at any scooter event.

Sex did raise money for the event and selling Sex to uniformed law enforcement in public was a rush. AND WE DIDN'T GET ARRESTED! Bottom line, everyone loved Sex and thought it was funny.

If you have a worthy cause and want to raise funds for your organization by selling Sex, please let us know. We can set you up with samples, brochures, and inventory for the most fun you've every had raising money. HIT: you must have really good looking girls and guys selling Sex to pull this off, and the less cloths the better.

Enjoy your Sex!

Sex at PeaceKeepers MC Show

Sex does have social benefits and on June 28th we'll be selling Sex to benefit the late Senior Corporal Victor Lozado and the "Assist the Officer Foundation". The PeaceKeepers Motorcycle Club, Lone Star Chapter, will host their 2nd annual Bike Show at Twin Peaks Restaurant, 18995 LBJ Freeway, Mesquite, TX, Saturday, June 28th from Noon to 5:oo PM. Bike contest with 8 classes, prizes, lots of bikes, low riders, food & beer, raffles, silent auctions, live music, bounce house, dunk tank and a special guest appearance.

Every time we sell Sex $1.00 will go toward to the benefactors of this event. It might be the first time anyone has bought sex in public, in front of hundreds of police officers and not gotten arrested. Come down and enjoy the fun and buy all the Sex you can...it's for a worthy cause!

Where to buy Sex

Sex is a great gag gift and a suggestive little curio you'll want to have sitting around or given as a party favor at your next adult bash. You can buy it here on-line or at the following retail locations:

DALLAS, TX : New Fine Arts

AUSTIN, TX: Dreamers DVD or Lamar Video

Remember: a little Sex is good for everyone, and a little Sex is just what we sell.

BEST FATHER'S DAY GIFT

What could be better than giving the man of the house what he has always wanted...Sex! Doesn't matter that you have a headache, or that your pissed off at him. Giving him our Sex is a subbtle reminder that you're thinking of him but he's still not going to get the real thing from you any time soon.

New Lower Price for Sex!

$4.89 for Sex! Yep, we're having a summer sale. It's hot outside, people are heading for the beech, on vacation and chilling by the pool. All great places for Sex! It's a great time for Sex (or sex) parties and you'll need some trendy little party favors to get everyone in the right state of mind.

Sex at University of Arizona

Yep... I had Sex there last week! I had Sex in the Student Union and the book store. I had Sex in the South Building in the ROTC computer room. Hell, I had Sex every where on campus. Don't tell American Airlines, but I had Sex on their airplane too.Next month we'll have Sex in Hawaii, Chicago, and Akron, Ohio. Every where I go people want Sex and ask, "where can I get some Sex". You are there, on the only web site in the world that sells the one and only, "original" Sex. Get ya Some!

Sex Cost Less When You Buy More

When we ship Sex right to your door, a good portion of the cost is shipping and handling. What most people don't know is that the handling cost is just $1.00 no matter how many units you purchase, and postage (USPS) is incrementally smaller the more units that are shipped. EXAMPLE: One unit of Sex shipped in Texas has $.47 of State Sales Tax, + $1.00 handling, + $1.81 shipping. The total cost of one unit of Sex is $8.97 (still the cheapest sex you'll ever buy). If the same person ordered 6 units of Sex, the total cost would be $40.07, or $6.67 per unit (shipped).

We know having Sex by yourself is pleasurable, but its meant to share. Giving Sex and sharing Sex with others will make them happy and that is what Sex is all about. Sex is humorous, even before you take is out of the box. Check out our disclaimer printed on the inside flap:

DISCLAIMER: There are endless, humorous ideas on how to present Sex. Most of the above are stupid, politically incorrect, ideas that can get you fired, kicked out of school or slapped. Giving Sex to police may be funny but could get you arrested. Use Sex responsibly and in the correct company. Giving Sex to family members is socially unacceptable and disgusting, unless you live in very rural, back woods communities with no indoor plumbing. Please don’t try to eat Sex or stick it in any body orifice as it may cause injury or death, not to mention making you look like a moron when you arrive at the hospital or morgue. If you don’t know what the word orifice means, then put Sex back in the box, back where you found it, and leave it alone. You’re not intelligent enough to have Sex and stay out of trouble.

We hope you enjoy your Sex and by all means, share it with others. This requires your nimble little fingers to link on over to www.sexsoldhereonline.com and place your order now. Get Ya Some!!!!

New Fine Arts

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Protected Sex

Keeping it in you pocket is just fine. Not the same pocket with your keys or change, as that will cause small surface scratches. No problem having your Sex on the fireplace mantel or book shelf. Just brush the dust off once and a while. The maid always messes my Sex up. I get home and she has Sex somewhere in the house where I never have it; the kitchen, dinning room table, my son's desk. You have to watch Sex with your maid. I've heard a lot of men have the same problem.

Keep your Sex clean and safe and you'll have it for a long time. Mine has stayed hard an shinny for years!

Sex in the City?

Sarah Jessica Parker (SJP) needs to be congratulated for her branding. Hit TV show, to movie, and now clothing line. We all know sex sells and SJP has pulled every product debuted on the Sex in the City show up the success ladder with her. Designers to distillers, if people heard or saw it on her show they are buying it now.

I never did send her our Sex. It would have looked nice in her bedroom.

Rainy Day Sex

It's a rainy day here in the Dallas area. What do you think about making a Sex movie? Yep...Sex needs a movie. I have some script ideas, but maybe you'd like to provide some input. What would you like to see in our movie?

Should Persons Under age 18 Buy Sex?

Is Sex (our product)so suggestive that it warrants treatment as explicit sexual material? This is a debate between owners of our firm. We know the statistical data on sexual activity with youth in America today. Though we do not condone sexual activity during adolescents, some of us know that sexually oriented humor is more embraced by youth than actual physical, sexual acts.

Now it may be against school policy to have nude pictures in a school locker, but an artistic impression of the word "sex", such as our product. It's a hoot to tell your friends you have Sex in your locker, or shared Sex with your girl/boy friend in the hall way. Taking a picture of Sex in these settings and submitting them to us may even win you a trip to the Bahamas.

Then there are those students on summer break, doing cool things in exotic places. Take a picture of Sex in these strange and unusual places and you could win big! Just think, you buy our funny little novelty item, you take a creative picture clearly depicting our product in an unusual setting an win an expense paid trip for you and a friend to an exotic paradise. Its easy and fun.

Also please write and tell us the funny things you've done with Sex. Oh yea, if you below age 18, please don't tell us. It will freak out the up tight dudes here. Just tell us you buying it for your mom. It's Mother's Day ya know!

DISCLAIMER: Sex, as noted here is our product and not a physical act, so don't send us any nasty pictures of you boinking your girl friend in the elevator or in the oval office of the White House.

Buy Sex 2 for 1 This week!

Nothing like discount Sex! You'll never (well maybe hardly ever) have a 2 fer offered by the professionals on Harry Hines Ave. but you can get it at www.sexsoldhereonline.com. Starting today, what ever the amount of Sex you buy from our web site, we'll send you double that amount. You order 1, we send you 2, you order 2, we send you 4. Easy!

We made Sex to share and give to friends. Now you can afford to buy Sex and share it with twice as many people.

This special will last until Noon CST, on May 26th. It might be to late to buy Sex for Mother's Day but you can give Sex to all your friends out at the Memorial Day cook out or that graduation gift for someone special.

We're pimpin at twice the speed so get ya some while supplies last.

I'm not a Pimp!

I'm not a pimp, I'm a purveyor of Sex. That was my retort when I was introduced in a business meeting today as a person who sells sex. You should has seen the jaws in the room drop. Grocking people is the whole purpose of Sex. Up-setting the status quo, freaking people out, and reveling in the vast reactions we get when presenting Sex in public. Not quite as bold as banging your wife or girl friend on the table at III Forks restaurant, but you'll never get arrested or thrown out for have our Sex on the table either.

Give your waiter a tip and a good chuckle, a have Sex on the table the next time you go to the restaurant.

It's Friday...have you bought Sex today?

The end of the work week...
The weekend is here...
What are you going to do?

Maybe something good we hope. Take your Sex with you and snap a picture with you and you Sex in a strange place. Send it to us and you might win a prize!

Sex for Sale in Austin, Texas

Thanks to Dreamers DVD in the Lone Star state, the students at University of Texas can now buy Sex before they return home for summer break. Dreamers has 4 locations in Austin and if you don't see it in the store you need to walk up to the cashier and tell them you'd like to buy Sex. Hopefully they'll still have our Sex in stock and not try to pass of some sleazy prostitute with a questionable health record. You'll know the difference when: 1) your charged way more than our sweet little Sex cost, and 2) The box has hair and not the artistic satin red that ours comes in.

And if you UT students don't like the high quality chrome finish that Sex come in, I'll make some in UT orange for you next year.

Enjoy your Sex, and Hook'em Horns!

What I want to be

When I was young I never though of selling sex. Being a pimp was the last thing on my mind. The Internet is an amazing place where you can buy anything from an old Pet Rock to a new kidney. Hell, why not sell Sex* on the Internet!

If you know us, you know the Sex* we sell is clean and free of STDs. You can buy our Sex* and have it anywhere. You can be the ugliest person in the world with no functional sex organ and still enjoy our Sex*. If you haven't been to our web site you need to, but don't go there thinking you'll see tasty material to motivate masturbation. Our Sex* is an artistic novelty item...a subject for adult humor...a source of endless sexual puns.

I have Sex* in my truck. I have Sex* there all the time, and everyone that rides in my truck enjoys my Sex* too. Buy my Sex* and share it with your friends. Give Sex* as a gift, and have Sex* everywhere you go.

Send me a picture of your Sex* and we'll post it on our web site.

Sex ya later!

* Our product and not a cheap physical act.

We Were in Penthouse Forum!!!

Hell Ya! Penthouse digs our sex and we bet you will too. If you need to get some go to www.sexsoldhereonline.com

Everyone wants or needs a little sex, and that is what we have. A little Sex. Sex on this blog refers to our small adult novelty item. If you ever wished you could have sex any where, anytime and any place... well know you can. You can share sex with anyone, give sex to someone who has never had it and finally be able to tell your friends you've had Sex!!!